Who ordered the veal scaloppine?
A MOTHER’S STORY
by PAUL RUDNICK
Even during my pregnancy, I’d had my suspicions. I remember peering at the ultrasound screen as my obstetrician told me, “Look, it’s a brand-new life,” and all I could say was “Fine, but why are we watching the Discovery Channel?” And then, after I gave birth, a nurse placed something on my chest and cooed, “Here’s your little miracle,” and I glanced down, bewildered, and asked, “Who ordered the veal scaloppine?”"
by PAUL RUDNICK
Parents would certainly deny it, but Canadian researchers have made a startling assertion: parents take better care of pretty children than they do ugly ones."Until I saw the article in the Times, I’d felt so utterly alone. Was I the only one? The sole parent on earth who knew the anguish, the heart-shattering despair of— All right, I’ll just say it, right out loud. I am the mother of an ugly child. She’s not deformed or handicapped or odd; she’s unattractive.
—The Times
Even during my pregnancy, I’d had my suspicions. I remember peering at the ultrasound screen as my obstetrician told me, “Look, it’s a brand-new life,” and all I could say was “Fine, but why are we watching the Discovery Channel?” And then, after I gave birth, a nurse placed something on my chest and cooed, “Here’s your little miracle,” and I glanced down, bewildered, and asked, “Who ordered the veal scaloppine?”"
